Reaction Habits: Our Lives Are Teaching Us!

Seeing reaction habits is powerful!

Our lives are teaching us…that saying is really so very true. My life is constantly teaching me things. Most importantly I keep learning about me. Including reaction habits of mine that get in my way!

At times something happens and I am able to see a reaction habit I have that I hadn’t seen before. When I see clearly it helps me grow and know more about me.

I remember the very first time I noticed reaction habits of mine.

It was back in my mid 20’s when I was learning how to be a separate person from my parents and wanted to change how I reacted to my mom. I vividly recall seeing an old very familiar way I had been reacting towards her mid doing. And, I smiled at myself for catching me.

Until that moment I had kept my focus on what my mom was doing and ignored me.

There was such power in that moment because I saw what I was doing. And as a result, was able to intentionally change my reaction habit.

My mom however caught that smile and thought I was being smart with her! I explained that I had just realized what I was doing in that interaction we were having. I shan’t forget that important moment of my life.

Reaction habits: it’s them, not me…

It’s easy for us to be caught up in what someone else is doing that rubs us the wrong way. That focus however keeps us from learning about ourselves and growing and, keeps us in misery and suffering. We can end up experiencing depressed and anxious moods too.

I only have control over me.

Learning how to see, watch, be witness to our own thoughts, reactions, behaviors is where wisdom and growth lie. This is how we make change happen and peace dwells within our soul. And, we get to have a smile on our face too!

Do you have a challenging relationship in your life?

If so, what is your reaction habit of thoughts or behaviors in your interactions with that person? Put your mind’s eye on what you are doing, thinking, saying when they are being them. Notice and observe you.

If you don’t like how the interaction plays out, alter how you proceed.

We fall into patterns and form habits in our close relationships. Reaction habits are much like dance partners who each know so well how and where the dance routine is going to go next. If one alters their dance step, moves in another direction, the partner has to adjust and respond differently too. The dance changes for both of them.

In conversations if we change our reaction habits by responding in a different way, we change the flow of the discussion. The dynamics change and so does the outcome. Even a small change makes a difference in altering a reaction habit. And importantly we gain control of our self.

Reaction habits change is easier said than done.

It does take practice and lots of it to change a habit of any kind including a reaction habit. Be patient and kind to yourself as you practice too.

Don’t hesitate to reach out for professional help. Therapy can help us identify reaction habits that cause us emotional distress and harm not only ourselves but our relationships as well.

Do Contact Me Depression Therapy and Anxiety Therapy does help us learn about our self!

JD’s Midlife Tools For Living Practices, Holland, MI
Offering Heartfelt care, Compassion and Coping Tools!