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JD's Midlife Tools For Living Practices, LLC
April is fooling with me today. Mother Nature has dropped a cold white trick on me and my poor spring flowers. I only hope they can thaw out and bounce back for me to enjoy them once again once the sun warms the earth back up.
Early spring does have a way of teasing me and this year that has certainly been the case. I was curious about the origin of April Fools day wondering if it originated as a weather related phenomena and did a little research on line. To my surprise it was not born from my April weather experience at all, but Mother Nature certainly does know how to play her pranks and well beyond April 1st too!
It’s not exactly clear in history what inspired April Fools’ Day. According to News Discovery.Com, the most common theory about the earliest April Fools’ celebrations is that” in 1582, Pope Gregory XIII issued a papal bull decreeing a new standard calendar for Christian Europe that later became the standard internationally in the 21st century”.
According to the article, “prior to the 15th century, Europe’s nations and city states operated using the Julian calendar. The Gregorian calendar moved the date of the New Year from April 1 to January 1, among other changes. Catholic monarchies were naturally its earliest adopters, though Protestant nations later followed suit.
“Given the nature of the reform, both in terms of communicating such a fundamental change to a large population and dealing with critics of the new calendar, some Europeans continued to celebrate the new year between March 25 and April 1. April fools were those who still celebrated the holiday in the spring, and were the subject of pranks and ridicule by those who observed the New Year months ago.”*
So this fun tradition originated from bullying behavior!
I find it interesting to learn where sayings and traditions originate and notice how things morph over time. I certainly hope in today’s experiences of April Fools’ Day pranks that we don’t hurt the very people we are playing with!
There are life long impacts from being bullied when we are young. Being picked on at any age does indeed hurt and the scars can go very deep.
While I am all too eager to get out in my yard, I will have to wait a few more days and be patient as Mother Earth has decreed. The good news is there are much warmer temperatures in the forecast for next weekend…we will see what Mother Natures has in store for me then!
What experiences have you had with bullying in your lifetime?
I’ve had another appendage for years now. Currently, its color is blue. It’s had other colors in the past. It’s my water bottle and it goes with me just about everywhere. In fact on the rare occasion that I leave the house without it I feel rather naked just like when I don’t carry a purse.
I started drinking more water years ago when I was running. It was important to replenish the fluid my body sweated off during my runs. These days I am walking but the habit of consuming water throughout my day has stayed with me.
I even take my bottle with me when I go visit someone and in the house it comes with me too. I do this so it doesn’t get warm for my trip home but do find that I continue to use it once there.
It’s just gotten to be a habit to drink water and a good one too.
Several years ago I found a travel purse that has a neat little folding pocket to store my water bottle. That comes in handy when I’m going places and don’t want to carry my bottle in my hand. This week our local newspaper had an article about a variety of fancy water bottles that are on the market now from collapsible ones that fold into a small disk easy to store to one that has a filter in the bottle to purify the water as you drink it.
My goal is to drink at least 2 of my blue bottles a day. I’ve noticed that when I drink less I don’t feel as good and tend to get hungrier too.
In “6 Reasons to Drink More Water”*, a Web MD article, it says that our bodies consist of 60% water which helps our body’s digestion, absorption, circulation, in the creation of saliva, transportation of nutrients and maintenance of our body temperature. I did not know that all of these body systems are dependent on our intake of fluids to work!
The article also suggests that drinking water can help us control our calorie intake. Water energies our muscles. Cells that don’t maintain their balance of fluids and electrolytes shrivel which can result in muscle fatigue.
Water helps keep our skin looking good because our skin contains water. Our skin looks more dry and wrinkled when we are dehydrated. Our skin functions as a protective barrier to help us prevent fluid loss.
The article states that body fluids help our body transport waste products in and out of our cells to our kidneys and into our urine cleansing and ridding our body of toxins. If we don’t drink enough water we can be at a higher risk for developing kidney stones. When we are hydrated our gastrointestinal tract keeps things flowing well preventing constipation. When we don’t have enough body fluid the colon pulls water from our stools to maintain hydration and we become constipated.
And, fluid loss is accentuated as we get older too!
I did not know most of this information…I know so very little about how my body functions. Guess I’ve just added a number of more reasons to keep carrying that additional appendage of mine around!
Do you drink enough water? How might you add more H2O into your life if not?
I’ve started my annual spring cleaning projects around the house. Our bedroom and closet have been thoroughly dusted and vacuumed behind, in and under. My aching back told me so too.
I’m not as young as I used to be.
It seems projects requiring my physical effort take a little bit longer than they used to for me to complete. I am slower. I hurt more when I am done too. Ibuprofen has become like my new best friend! It’s not easy to acknowledge this as reality either.
My mind thinks of me as being 21 while my body tells me a different story.
Twenty years ago I worked one evening a week and had the morning home. In the hours before work I vacuumed the house and washed the floors and then got ready and worked a full day’s load. There is no way that I could so easily accomplish that effort today. I wouldn’t want to attempt it either. I’d be too worn down to do a good job towards the end of that very long day.
This is just the beginning of noticeable changes that occur as we age for me. I see evidence of things to come when I glance towards people older than I am. I recognize just where I am headed. It’s scary to peek at that reality too.
A youthful body gets further behind me with each passing day.
I can color away the gray and put cream on the wrinkles to smooth them out but my body’s response to physical efforts can’t be simply covered up or ignored. I am getting older and my body tells me so.
It’s growing increasingly important to exercise and stretch those well-worn muscles of mine. This I can and need to do to help remain healthy and active into the years ahead.
Spring cleaning projects feel great to see accomplished at any age. I suspect as time progresses I will increasingly be grateful to have the ability to accomplish those projects too!
What changes are you noticing in your body as you age?
I learned a wonderfully helpful meditation tool many years ago. As you sit with focus on your breath when you inhale say to yourself: “Everything is”; and when you exhale say to yourself: “As it should be”. Say this over and over and over and over again too with each breath you take.
I remember vividly at the training session that soon into my experience I had tears streaming down my face. Don’t recall what I had been clinging to that day but I clearly recall letting go.
To accept that everything is as it should be, means that we radically accept life as it is. We don’t have to like it just accept it is what it is. But it takes practice and lots of it to radically accept life as it is.
We all want what we want and often when we want it too. However, this causes us so much pain and misery because life happens not to be exactly what we want or need or hope or demand of it.
The reality that “everything is as it should be” came home to me in a real life example on my way home from work one day.
I was driving through the heart of the small town I live in behind a person who I thought had too much space ahead of them. We hit a read light at the last stop light because that driver was so slow. And after the light changed we managed to get caught for a train! Of all things too! Not just a red light but a train! I was not a happy camper. Grumble…grumble….
Waiting for the train to pass I noticed a woman about three cars behind me got out of her car and ran up the line of cars. It was a beautiful warm day and I had my window open. She came right up to my widow and kindly informed me that I had lost a hub cap about two blocks behind. I thanked her and she ran back to her vehicle before the train finished going by.
I retrieved my hub cap thanks to her and that pokey driver ahead of me and that train that I grumble at each time I catch it on my way home. Had none of that happened I would have arrived home and maybe noticed the missing hub cap. I would have not known when or where I’d lost it. I might not have even noticed it was missing. I may have never found it.
I am very grateful for those drivers both a head and behind me and for that train and those events that happened just like they did. It was all meant to be.
I’ve grumbled at that train when it makes me a little later getting home after a long day and I am tired and hungry. But now I’ve realized an appreciation for the company who uses it for transport. They’ve provided jobs for thousands of people over the years, paid taxes that support the community and have donated in many ways to better the community.
Looking beyond this community there are probably hundreds of thousands of people who are touched in some form by that train and its cargo.
Because of this, my attitude about that train has changed. My patience with other drivers has improved. I notice I’ve had more pleasant trips driving home from work this week.
Everything really is just as it should be which is not always the way I demand of life to be. When I open and see that more clearly I am a much happier camper indeed!
Will you pause and reflect on your day to see how everything is as it should be?
Do contact me to work on your radical acceptance with depression therapy and/or anxiety therapy today!
JD’s Midlife Tools For Living Practices, Holland, MI Offering Heartfelt care, Compassion and Coping Tools!
It’s amazing to me what information you can find on the internet for free in the matter of seconds. Just a bit ago I looked up a knitting stitch I was having trouble understanding from the picture and explanations in the books I have here at home. And, low and behold in the matter of less than a minute I found a short video clip that helped me see what I was missing.
Not so many years ago a challenge like that might have involved a trip to the nearest knitting store or visiting a friend who knits to find a skilled knitter to show me how to do it. And in less than a minute my dilemma was resolved. An instant fix to a problem I was having.
In my life time there has been a tremendous amount of change. Often I see value in the benefits change has provided. Often I shake my head in frustration longing for the good old days when life was simpler, you knew you’d find the products you’ve come to enjoy on the store shelf each week, and you could get something fixed when it broke or a part wore out. That’s all changed. It’s a challenge to find some products I’ve come to enjoy and finding someone to fix things or locating parts at times can be more hassle than it is worth doing.
I am a “tech idiot”—a description I’ve given me as a way of laughing with myself and my tech follies. It’s also a way to explain to tech savvy people my level of skill when I am trying to communicate with them about things I haven’t the proper words or understanding to communicate clearly to them about.
A few weeks ago the host of my website made some upgrades in the tools used to create the sites they host. I learned of this when I logged into my account to add a new blog post that week. The changes involved in the upgrade challenged me greatly to use and I am still learning how to use them. I am sure I-page is very happy to be offering such new and improved tools to their customers. I however was not at all happy. In fact, I was so frustrated that for about 24 hours I considered whether to stop having a website or move it some place else.
And then, after the frustrated energy inside me dissipated, my wise mind kicked in. And, I was able to see more clearly and realize that no matter what I want technology changes are going to keep right on happening. My minimal skill level will either continue to be a source of frustration to me or I can use each change as an opportunity to learn a new skill or two.
There is no sense swimming up stream against the current of change and waste precious time, energy and peace of mind. It is what it is.
And I am who I am, a generation or two removed from what’s currently being taught in school and it’s a great big world of things to learn.
It will be good for me to remember just how simple and easy it was to locate the solution to my knitting problem when some new “fangled” changed phenomena gets under my skin!
How are you at negotiating through the challenges of change in your life? What tools help you cope?
This is a perfect day to make time to be sweet on your very own self, not just those special Valentine’s in your life. Why not woo yourself like you would anyone else!
We are generally better at giving to others than we are to ourselves. Let this day be a reminder to give to you too.
Fix a cup of your favorite tea or hot chocolate and curl up with an afghan and a good book, or take a luxurious soak in the tub with a candle or two and your favorite scented bubbles surrounding you. And, don’t forget to tell yourself that you love you.
Ever write a love letter to yourself? In honor of Valentine’s Day you can make it all pretty with hearts and even sparkles and mail it to yourself. Tell the things you like/love about you, things about you for which you are grateful and appreciate, things about you that make you glad you are you. Be sure to include that you are loved and cared for by you too. What would it be like to receive such a letter written by you to you?
I hope you will take a few moments of time today to do something extra special for that wonderful person called YOU! Will you be your very own Valentine?
What will you to do to be your very own Valentine today?
For several years I started my day lighting a candle, reading a meditation and focusing on my breath and on the candle flame. This practice helped center me and prepare me for the day ahead. I would do this of course after my first morning cup of coffee!
Last year in the midst of all the change I was experiencing I stopped lighting the candle and focusing on my breath. My morning routine had changed and I didn’t seem to have the time to fit it in.
Recently, I decided to restart this part of my daily practice. It feels good to give this back to me and work it into my morning routine. My mind, body and spirit missed this special time. I realized the loss once I started doing it again.
It feels like home to sit quietly and watch the candle flicker as I notice my breath coming in and out of my body.
I study the flame as I breathe to help my monkey mind from wandering all over the place. I bring my focus back to the flame and my breath when it wanders away.
It is soothing too. It grounds me. It connects me to the world around me and to the universe. My spiritual self is awakened in the process. I am comforted and feel more whole.
This gift of a few moments of well spent time awaits me each day. It is my choice to open the package and experience where this precious gift takes me today.
What centers you, prepares you for your day and connects you spiritually?
Our little McAllister cat has been sick again this week and went back to the vet for medical help. I am very grateful the additional medications are helping her to get better.
When facing loss or the potential for it, it is so easy for me to deeply appreciate what and who I have in my life. This week my fear of losing McAllister created an opportunity once again to take stock and be grateful for all that life has given to me.
I wonder what my life would be like if I could hold that vividly intense grateful perspective each and every day so close to my heart.
Gratitude is a gift that comes from the hard times life brings to me. My task is to learn make use of that gift each day.
I can learn to weave gratitude into the very fabric of my daily life and hold it whisper close to my heart.
There are opportunities awaiting me every moment of every day to savor and relish!
What in your life are you grateful for today?
It is so easy for me to talk myself into not wanting to do outdoor activity in the winter. I did that yesterday by thinking it was too cold to go for a walk. Yes, it was snowing and blowing but I am amply equipped with all the gear I need to stay toasty warm. I suppose if it is minus 50 that would not be true but it wasn’t that cold yesterday.
This morning I put my warmest winter coat on with just my jammies underneath and my boots and gloves and headed outside and shoveled the driveway. It was snowing and blowing and cold but I was plenty warm.
I talked myself into venturing out this morning. I talked myself into staying inside yesterday. What I tell myself makes such a difference.
Our self-talk is powerful.
We can be our own best friend or worst enemy with the chatter that goes on in our heads.
We make choices every moment to have the thoughts that we think. We are not always aware however, that we do in fact make choices to think the thoughts we let swirl around in our minds.
Our thoughts can be so automatic and programmed that we fail to credit our very own selves with them. They are however ours. Whose else could they possibly be?
We can become more aware of our thoughts and the outcomes that result from the paths that we take in our thinking. An open, non-judgmental, curiosity will allow us to develop a mindful awareness of our thinking. It’s an opportunity to observe our minds in action and affords us the opportunity to make a choice about where our thoughts will lead us.
I can catch thoughts that aren’t so realistic— it’s too cold to go outside, and replace them with those that are more accurate—I do have plenty of layers of warm clothing to keep me from freezing.
There is power in recognizing I have this choice to make! Just like that little engine that could…I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I did it!
Where is your self-talk taking you today?
I have a meditation booklet that has a passage to read each day. Most days I read the passage for the day. I know my day goes better when I do take a few moments to reflect and quietly center myself at the start of the day.
The introduction for this year has a suggestion in it to “live each day looking at the world through eyes of wonder”.
Wow, just imagine what this perspective would bring to each moment of our day!
Just what opportunities would unfold if we look with a fresh pair of wide open eyes to take in the world and notice the crisp clear details we all too often miss? What a gift this would be!
I encourage you to incorporate “eyes of wonder” into the next 363 days of 2016—remember this is a leap year. We’ve been given the present of an extra day this year too!
May you take nothing for granted and receive everything life brings your way in 2016 as a gift!
How might you bring an “eyes of wonder” opportunity into this very day?
Happy New Year’s Eve to you! As we bid 2015 a farewell and look towards a brand new year many of us make resolutions for change in the New Year ahead.
It is important to remember that making changes in our life requires patience, persistence and practice.
It is hard work to create a new habit opportunity and rewarding when we see progress towards our goal. It’s important not to give up on ourselves too soon.
I learned recently that grocery stores order extra vegetables for the first two weeks of the New Year and quickly go back to their normal order quantity because people’s enthusiasm for change diminishes just that fast!
We want change to be easy and in reality it is not.
As we reflect on change opportunities to make in 2016 it is important to consider what we need to let go of—the thoughts, beliefs and patterns that might hold us back from establishing the change opportunities we so want to create.
–What trouble from my past am I ready to release?
–What hurt am I ready to forgive?
–What beliefs keep me stuck in unwanted familiar behaviors?
–What thoughts do I carry that circle round and round and prevent me from moving forward?
–What am I willing to forgive myself for having done?
–What can I do to be more kind and gentle with myself?
–What can I do when the going gets tough and I think about giving up to keep taking steps toward my goal?
Here’s to you and the change opportunities that you want to foster in the New Year ahead!
Wishing you a peaceful Happy New Year!
All the presents are unwrapped, gifts put away, and family visits completed…now what? All the busyness of the season is past me once again. It goes by so quickly too. We plan and anticipate for weeks and then it’s over.
It saddens me a bit too when it’s all said and done. This is such a fun time of the year getting to visit with special people. I wish it didn’t have to end and people didn’t have to go home.
I keep reminding myself that all of life is an opportunity to be experienced.
That includes the opportunity to let go and allow for the opportunity which comes next to present itself. If I don’t let go I can’t be open to fully experience the next opportunity life gives to me. When I stay trapped in my head life goes on around me without me noticing. I miss out when I hang on.
What opportunities is life providing to you today?
