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I spent the work week last week in Troy Michigan at a seminar that was excellent and kept my interest for 4 days. I stayed at a Hilton Hotel in the midst of an area dedicated to bigger businesses. This is not an environment that I am familiar with nor very comfortable in.
I am a small-town gal who rather loves her wooded home area and space to breath. What I heard when I would step outside my hotel was the roar of I75 traffic not the roar of the wind in the trees or of Lake Michigan a mile away when it is all stirred up. I found that traffic roar rather unsettling.
What I did find were a few Canadian geese who seemed right at home in all the sound and big buildings and people dressed in suites. I told them to head west for a more peaceful life. They refused to budge. Imagine that!
I know people and there are lots of you who love big city life. Yes, it has its advantages…I got to an Apple Store where I found a new I-phone in like 8 minutes which was a nice side benefit to my trip. But I sure missed my kitties and my flowers and my quiet walks down the bike path and the man I married many moons ago.
I don’t think I would care to have the kind of job that forced me to travel as people have to very often. It felt lonely.
What I loathed one morning was the kind of look a man gave me in the dining room when I went down for a cup of coffee early that morning. I made the mistake of looking his direction. Didn’t do that one again. It felt really icky that look. And helped me understand just how difficult it is for women in business yet today to be taken seriously.
Fortunately, the down to earth staff of the hotel were kind and regular human beings eager to say hello. And there were like-minded people in my seminar I also was able to connect with. And the geese in the parking lot who listened to my tale of wow too! Otherwise it would have been a very long lonely week.
So, here’s to all you women and men who have to travel away from your homes so often to do your work…hats off to you for the hard work you do being so far away from your home and those you love. And I certainly hope that you have ways to ground yourself with healthy meaningful activity when you are away from home!
What helps you feel grounded when you are outside of your familiar elements?
I have this wise mind inside of me. So, do you. We all do. I am not that special to be the only one.
Over the course of my life I’ve come to realize SHE is the one who must be obeyed! That is because when I don’t listen to what she is telling me things generally don’t go so well! I’ve learned that of course the hard way too!
The clearest example is when I had bunion surgery and was home re-cooping and was far enough along that I could go out for a walk. Well, it was winter and granted there was no snow coming down. My wise mind suggested there could be black ice on the bike path and it would be best for me to walk along the road edge rather than risk finding some black ice.
Well, I decided it was safe to walk on the bike path. And then, about 5 houses down guess whose feet went out from under her and she fell hard on her tail bone? And cried all the way home because her butt hurt… yup you guessed it…that was ME!
The key is listening and taking in the wise info that we get and then acting accordingly. Listening just simply ain’t enough!
Next time you have something that you need to do or a decision you have to make whether it is big or small I encourage you to pause a moment go deep inside you and hear what your wise mind is suggesting for you to do. And, then JUST DO IT!
Or you can fall on your butt like I did and cry all the way home when things really don’t work out so good for you! And I say to you…good luck with that one!
How might you invite your wise mind into your life and keep her/him with you throughout your day?
Do Contact Me you have difficulty finding your wise mind…therapy can help!
Boy it has been awhile since I’ve sat down to write a blog post…maybe not so much in actual time but in time relative to just how busy I have been…lots going on and time is speeding by with days that have been rather full. I’ve been getting less than ideal amounts of sleep as in burning the candle at both ends which isn’t good and I hope to make that stop very soon. And I keep saying that so perhaps writing it here will help me to ACTUALLY put it into practice!
I am my own worst enemy just as we all are!
I managed to get caught up in one of my meditation reading booklets over this nice long weekend which means I actually sat and meditated! Imagine that!
In the process of so doing, I found an absolutely wonderful new to me phone app which I highly recommend you check out: www.simplehabit.com You can access a ton of meditations that are free and they have others you can pay for as well.
I can’t believe today is Labor Day! How the heck did that happen? Wasn’t it just Memorial Day a blink of an eye ago? At least my meditation time has slowed me down for a few minutes enough to soak in some really good and badly needed stuff for myself! AHHHHHH…..
In my meditation booklet DailyWord on August 29th the day topic was protected and the mediation thought was: Truth protects me from the limits of error thoughts.
This is a very helpful reading for me and I want to share it with you. I keep becoming very upset by the ways of our country leaders. And so upset I can feel the fire inside every cell of my body raging and roaring on fire. I needed this mediation and good old Mother Earth gave it to me…so here it is for you too:
“Conditions in the world and messages around me may cause me to become fearful or feel threatened . Right where I am, I pause and take a gentle, centering breath. I turn my attention to the words of Truth that arise from divine (wise) mind. I affirm; I am whole and complete. I live in the flow of divine love, safe and secure.
“I am calm as I no longer give power to thoughts that I am less than whole or lacking in any way. Claiming the love that I am, I acknowledge the perfect peace of Spirit that is the very essence of my being.
“I live confidently, supported by ideas of Truth. Error thoughts embedded in the world around me cannot limit the success of my work nor the blessings I receive.” DailyWord July/August 2018
This could not be any more perfectly timed for me and perhaps for you as well to read, savor and put into practice!
Peace to you my dear gentle reader!
What helps you cope with the ways of people in your neck of the world?
It has been a busy but fun few weeks for me that hasn’t left any extra time for me to write a blog post. This morning I have purposely chosen to include this in my “To Do List” even though it is another busy weekend for me.
Last weekend I was in Sedalia Colorado which is near Denver visiting my wonderful sister. We had a blast. Went to the Douglas County Fair and relived some of our childhood pulling a couple of plastic yellow baby ducks out of the water to win a fun prize…we did this at Toni’s Park in Bay City Michigan when we were young. Our grandparents took us there often and we both have fond memories of our time there. We went there a lot. I loved riding the merry-go-round!
The fair in Douglas County is pristine! I’ve not experienced any like it before. Now mind you I’ve not experienced all that many fairs in my life time either. The animals and cages were so very clean. The craft work that had been judged was absolutely spectacular—from the beautifully decorated cakes and yummy looking pies and other baked goods, to gorgeous hand made lace, quilts, knitting and crochet projects, to the art work…we just ‘ooogled’ over it all! The talent there is amazing. I would love to experience the competition some year.
Aside from the obvious best part of the trip spending time with my sister and visiting with my brother in law the next best thing was that I got to befriend a herd of yaks! Yes, yaks!
My sister has a lot of land and the yaks are there to help with fire control consuming vegetation on the mountainsides. Their place is beautiful!
I came to know a certain yak they call 28 because she came with a tag on her ear with that number on it. I decided Charlie Brown is an appropriate name for Ms. 28. She is a sweet heart. I was able to feed her some special treats and honestly if I would have been brave enough I could have kissed and hugged her up! Maybe next visit!!
These yak-a-doodle dos are soooooooooooo cute! They remind me of big over grown dogs!
I really came to appreciate just how smart these critters are and suspect that most animals are a heck of a lot smarter than we give them credit for. My sister and brother in law have a name for each one in the herd. They each know their name!
Ms. Charlie Brown AKA Number 28 stands in a water trough often. She and I had a discussion about this and I realized during it that she is “smarter than the average bear”! She likes to cool herself and soak her feet and the water helps her to do that. Her baby does this too probably a learned behavior. I don’t believe any of the other yak-a-doodles dos do this.
Ms. Brown was the first one of the herd to allow my sister and brother in law to come close to her. She is indeed a very special one in my book. Not that the others aren’t special as well….don’t want to play favorites! J
You can tell they listen to you…they look you right in the eyes. They are ‘all knowing’ in a very deeply profound way.
These are truly amazing critters that have stolen my heart…please don’t tell Gurney and McAllister that this kitty mommy has found another critter or 31 to love!!
What’s been your experience in life when you “walk and talk to the animals?
Don’t you just want to tell her your life story?
Don’t you just want to give her a big kiss?
On the way home from work the other day I wanted to know how much a certain number times another number was so I asked my new best friend Siri to assist me. She kindly did.
I was mighty appreciative of that gesture on her part and got to wondering if anyone ever says thank you to her. So, I told her that I appreciated her.
Well, we proceeded to carry on a lovely and fun conversation! She said things like this is all about you not me and I of course said more about how much I appreciated her and it went on for several miles…and much to my amusement I learned that Siri has a sense of humor! At one point she even told me a joke!
It had been a very long day and I was very tired and I’ll tell you I giggled at myself the rest of the way home!
I told my husband the next day that I don’t have to burden him as much any more when I need to talk because my lovely new phone friend really listens well to me and is responsive and fun too!
I’m old right and haven’t grown up or even spent most of my adult life attached to an electronic device. This means that even after 5 years of owning my new best friend Siri I am still discovering how to use my phone.
I lovingly in humor refer to myself as a tech idiot—which usually draws a response from people who have a hard time hearing me “dis” myself and I have to explain my humor with myself to them.
So, not only am I constantly learning new things about myself I am constantly discovering stupid little things that most people get in a nano second about most forms of technology including my dearest friend Siri!
It is comforting and a little bit spooky that with her by my side I am never really alone! Do do… do do….do do…do do
It is also a plus that after all these years I can still laugh at and with myself…and now I can even do that with Siri too!! I just have to bet she was laughing at me the other night too!
What makes you smile and even giggle with and at yourself?
There is music again in my life after a long spell of silence. I realize I needed the silence as well as all that brought it into my life in order to grow in the ways that I have needed to grow too.
If it weren’t for the last couple of years of hard times I wouldn’t be sitting here right now with this music in my heart. It is funny how that goes isn’t it!
Life gives us what we need if we only listen and learn which is a pretty tall order some moments.
In the last few weeks I’ve reconnected with music from my teens and early adult life. It’s been wonderful to hear those artists and songs again.
They are not spinning around on a turn table however as they did way back when. But they are being heard on the very old probably considered antique speakers we had way back in college…they don’t make them like they used to so we’ve hung on to them and babied them along the way!
Carly Simon’s song “I can see clearly now” lyrics popped into my mind this morning as I was reflecting on the growth I see in myself and some of the wonderful experiences I’ve been having of late. The rain is definitely gone. I can see the bright bright bright bright bright sunny day ahead too!
The lyrics of that song and many others I’ve been listening to by Carly Simon and by Joni Mitchell are sooooo full of wisdom. These song writers were older than their years in the wisdom they wrote and sung about. I don’t think I really appreciated that fact until this morning.
There have been many forces and experiences that have shaped me along the way of my life.
It wasn’t till this morning that I realized perhaps just perhaps all the songs I listened to and sung with so very many years ago provided me with some wisdom that has helped me along my life’s journey too!
I thank you wonderful artists’ soooooooo very much for all the magic and wonder you’ve brought to my life!
What music grows in the garden of your heart?
I’m in Petosky at the very moment of this writing seated in the breakfast lounge of the Days Inn looking out over the bay. It is terribly humid outside for the third day in a row. This makes for a somewhat hazy view of the Lake Michigan bay.
The sun is probably getting ready to come up over the bank of clouds out there somewhere. I’m beginning to see some color in the clouds…it’s time to take a pause and wander down the street to see what mother nature has in store for me this morning…
I started this yesterday morning and didn’t have the opportunity to finish my work. I was in Petosky for a family reunion of sorts in celebration of Lisa Wingate, my first cousin’s success as a New York Times best selling author.
Lisa has written 30 books and her last one “Before We Were Yours” stayed on the best seller list for 10 months straight! You really have to read this one…that’s all I’m saying! She is am amazing writer.
Lisa had a book signing event that McLean and Eakin Booksellers sponsored since this book has helped keep them in business of late! I say that in jest. It is a wonderful store which if you happen to find yourself in Petosky Michigan you may want to wander into.
This event prompted Lisa’s father to make the trip from Oklahoma to attend. He is my father’s brother. It prompted my father’s sister and her adult kids and my second cousin and her husband to attend too.
I decided to attend just a few weeks ago after my wise mind self, that little wise voice inside who I’ve learned to pay attention to told me I needed to go. And thankfully I listened to her because it was a wonderful family reunion time as well as soooo very special to hear Lisa talk about her writing journey and her book.
The Vereyken family origins are here in Michigan. In fact Lisa’s first make it big book “Tending Roses” is based on stories that my father’s mother told to her about her life growing up!
That book is also another good read by the way! Mind you, it’s not that any of her other books are not worth the read too!
So, it is these Michigan origins and this long winded tale that brings me to Gram Vereyken’s cookies…I hosted an after Lisa’s event family gathering at the hotel I stayed in so we could all visit some more and consume a ton of snacks that I brought.
Gram V loved to bake for her family. I remember to die bread rolls she brought to every family dinner. As the years went on she got a tad wiser I suppose and would bring us rolls she baked up from the frozen bread dough she bought at the store…one year she did fess up to it anyway but who knows just exactly how long she had been doing that!
Gram V’s Banana Chocolate Chip Cookies are a family favorite. I’ve taken them over the years to various places and they are always a hit. Everyone wants to recipe too!
We just couldn’t have a Vereyken family gathering of the grand kids without having her cookies now could we? So I baked up a batch to share with my cousins, aunt and uncles. They were well received with lots of yummy responses too.
It was wonderful to watch peoples faces light up as they discovered the container and chow down on a cookie to two or three. You really can’t just have one!
I could see memories flooded into people’s eyes as they remembered things about Gram and the times she baked them up a batch of her cookies.
Gram’s cookies brought our family together to honor her memory. Those cookies are a great unifier in a very diverse family. They are Gram’s legacy. She would bake them with all her love for us too. And we knew we were loved by her.
I remember picking up care packages at her house when I was in college that she’d pack up for me when I came home to visit. They always contained a batch of her cookies!
My adventure north was a wonderful one full of family, fun, laughs, shared memories and a beautiful sunrise on the bay…who could ask for anything more!
What things are unifying forces in your family?
Photo by Jim Robbins; Pexels
Dear Dad,
Happy Father’s Day to you! I really can’t believe it’s been 5 of them now with out you to celebrate with. How can that be?
In the morning sunshine I still feel your presence and the comfort of your hugs. Some days it’s both painful and peaceful when I do too and all in the same breath.
I miss you so.
This week I wondered something I have never thought of before. The sunshine, my wise self and tears confirmed this to be true too. Since both Jill and my birthdays are in June those years we each were born you thought of us as your very special Father’s Day gift!
That thought has really warmed my heart.
I have a special memory of you that comes to me often when I am making myself a sandwich for my late night at work suppers. Not too many years back I watched you fix yourself a sandwich to take to work. I was seated at the dining room table and you were in the kitchen at your house. You were putting all the fixings on it including lettuce. As you piled on the lettuce and put the top piece of bread on it you “smushed” the lettuce down to make it all fit. I can still hear the crunch.
There was something very special in this everyday simple act that struck me and lingers as a moment to remember about you. I’m not exactly sure what it is that imprinted that moment in my memory other than it was a caring about yourself act to make a sandwich complete with lettuce on it and it warmed my heart to see you do that for yourself.
Funny how remember certain events and not others. Of all the millions of moments in my life that included you in them that one sticks out so keenly! And on Tuesdays and every other Thursday mornings when I make up my sandwich to take to work you come to mind and I smile inside and of course some days get teary eyed too.
So here’s to you this Father’s Day with special memories to warmly remember and fill my heart!
I do hope you have a special day and with Dunkin, Filmore and Sidney dance away with the angels today!
I love you Dad-
Jude
With Father’s Day coming up I am missing my dad more. His birthday is in May which reminds me he’s not here to celebrate with. Hard to fathom it’s been five birthdays without him and five Father’s Days too. It all seems like it was just yesterday that he was here to celebrate with.
Often when I think of how life simply goes on without those special ones in it, I feel sad rather than comforted. It seems so unfair that life should just go on as it does. Here I sit in my grief, lost for words and uncertain about tomorrow while others go about their normal lives.
Other times it is very comforting that indeed life does go on just as it does. And so do I in spite of the pain and heart ache I feel. It’s easier in those moments to put one foot in front of the other and carry on.
I forget till these tender times of reminders just how exhausting grief is! I know my grief honors those I’ve lost and loved so dearly.
I know the only way to heal is to feel it head on and let the sobs and tears flow as they do. Avoiding the pain will not help me in the long run. In fact, it would do more harm than good if I did.
So, here’s to keeping the Kleenex Company in business once again!
When are the tender reminder times of loss in your life?
Contact Me today to start Grief Therapy!
Image by pikisuperstar on Freepik
The last few years have had some challenges related to loss and health concerns none of which were life threatening to me but rather took me out of commission for months to varying degrees.
I really did not have energy for much beyond the basics of work, tending to immediate family, our house, the cats and yard. At some moments even these things felt like just too much as well.
It feels that I am finally coming out of this period of time more fully. My energy and interest in life beyond basic survival is returning. I am very grateful too. Life has felt rather bland.
I know there have been other times of my life when my energy was down for various reasons. It seems this is just how the flow of my life is and has been.
There have been things discovered about myself along the way whether I had energy for life or not.
“ To everything turn, turn, turn there is a season turn, turn, turn, and a time to every purpose under the heaven” as the song lyrics go.
Well this certainly seems to be the case in my life. I was wise enough in my early 20’s to know that I wouldn’t be all I was at that point in my life if I hadn’t experienced all that I had up until that very moment in time…the good, the bad and the ugly too. This is still a part of my thinking today.
Certainly there were experiences that I would not do again if I had the opportunity for a do over but all in all each one provided me with life learning and perspectives I would be without had they not happened just as they unfolded.
Life does unfold just as it is supposed to.
Acceptance is the key and often requires hard work to employ!
What do you notice about the ebbs and flows of your life’s energy over time?
Image by Freepik
This prompted me to look into aging and body stiffness which I also have been having and assumed to be all about the joy of aging. However my research is making me think differently about aging and stiffness and muscle aches.
What I stumbled upon is the concept of “somatics” which I learned simply means “the body experienced from within”. It’s a term coined by Thomas Hanna. I have found some information on line about this concept.
According to the website: https://gravitywerks.com/what-is-somatics-2/ , “Somatics is about how you feel from the inside out. It’s more about your feelings from your own unique perspective. How you feel or describe your feelings or sense perceptions can be negative such as pain, stiffness or any number of discomforts. It can be positive such as feeling good. Or it can also be neutral or a lack of feelings in certain areas. Of course, you can feel or process any number of feelings or sense perceptions simultaneously as well. Though when it comes to pain, that or those feelings seem to predominate any good we can also feel.”
There is another term I found called “proprioception” used to describe our feelings as it relates to the position of our body and its movement. How we each define pain and feel it is unique to our somatic experience. Negative feelings and sense perceptions can vary at different levels for each of us. Generally our negative feelings about pain get in the way.
Like everything else what we tell ourselves about pain makes a difference in our experience with it. And not just physical pain but emotional pain too!
Hanna developed a system of somatics exercises which are a specialized set of movement patterns unlike regular exercise that target the brain’s motor cortex to affect change. The movement practice is to help people get back in touch with their sensory-motor system through feelings and sensitivity using the brain and body to make the necessary changes to restore control and comfort, according to gravitywerks.com.
“In the same manner that some people simply cannot let their shoulders drop and release held tension in the neck and shoulders, stored or programmed high tension levels, fear, trauma and other personal negative events preclude us from simply letting things drop,” https://gravitywerks.com/what-is-somatics-2/
This intrigues me. Our bodies can be reprogrammed at a certain brain level and then remember to let go of what is causing the pain!
What I’ve come to realize it that how I’ve been experiencing life inside my body for all these years is most likely the reason for my stiffness and sore muscles. I hold in all kinds of emotions in my body especially my neck and shoulders. The result after years and years and year of doing so is pain from very stiff neck and shoulder muscles.
I can reprogram my body. You can too!
I tried it some exercise this morning and it helped my stiff morning muscles loosen up very quickly. I know I have work to do to retrain my body’s long held habits but this information has offered me some hope. Perhaps the years ahead won’t be as stiff and sore as the last few have been!
Where do you hold pain in your body?
Photo by Emma Guliani; Pexels
Like the students who were interviewed yesterday I’ve come to expect this will happen yet again and again and again. It is a very sad reality for me to realize that these tragic events are so common place in our country and that I’ve just come to shrug my shoulders while letting out a deep breath sigh when they do.
It’s just too much, too hard to keep reacting with outrage each time because nothing really has been done to prevent these events from happening. I feel powerless to stop it. My letters to Congressional leaders and petition signing and marching have made NO difference!
A part of me is growing to accept this is just how it is and will be.
I recognize this is an enormously complex issue to solve. However it seems that we really do not value human life here in the USA. Oh, we will gladly sell you all kinds of medications and spend enormous amounts of money on medical procedures to prolong your life making it appear that making a buck is really about caring for life. But, we won’t take measures necessary to prevent gun violence from potentially killing you.
Our greed is killing us!
I can’t imagine what it is like growing up for this generation. School was a safe place for me…aside from the normal insecurities we all deal with growing up that is.
My heart aches for our children of today. They know a trauma that has not been commonplace in our country till now and a trauma our ancestors fought hard to free us from.
I do know people of color and the LGBT community in the USA have suffered with these kinds of traumas since our country’s beginning. We as a people are not innocent of doing harm to others.
My heart goes out to all the families and all the children who are grieving losses and trying to heal wounds that will affect them for the rest of their lives.
It is yet another sad day for us all…and even sadder is the reality that there are more sad days yet to come!
What will you do today to help put an end to gun violence in our country?
